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Casual Friday
With such warm and beautiful weather, it’s time to start preparing
the garden and cleaning up the yard. In fact, we should already
have peas, radishes, broccoli and other cold weather vegetables
in the ground. I actually enjoy gardening and yard work, but I don’t
have much time to do it.
To make maximum use of my time, I’ve found a terrific resource
in the publications made available by the J&L Garden Center in Bountiful.
I receive by mail J&L’s free newsletter, which is published several
times a year and contains a great deal of timely information, reminding
me when and what to plant, when and how to prune, when to apply
fertilizer and insecticides, etc. It contains lots of great gardening
tips, timed appropriately for the season.
You can get the newsletter by regular mail, or read it here.
J&L also publishes a very helpful gardening calendar and also dozes
of handouts covering every gardening topic imaginable. You can pick
them up at the store, 620 North 500 West, Bountiful, or read them
on-line.
Words to Live By
(Source: The Federalist Patriot)
“There are a thousand hacking at the branches of evil to one who
is striking at the root.’ – Henry David Thoreau
“Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.” –
George Jean Nathan
“Jackie Robinson was honored in the U.S. Capitol this week.
What a ceremony. It doubled the number of statues in the Rotunda
because when it was mentioned that he was a lifelong Republican
and Richard Nixon supporter, the Democrats all turned to
stone.” – Argus Hamilton
Typo of the Week
The steaks are raised: “Renew your membership today at the most
generous level you can afford and help me stop Rove’s mignons (sic)
in their tracks.” – Washington State Democratic Party Chair Paul
Berendt
Week’s Best Late Night Humor
Jay Leno.... According to the American Journal of Nutrition,
the mother's genes are what drives obesity in children. How about
the mothers that drive their children to McDonald's? .... Martha
Stewart is getting out of prison this week. Boy, time really flies
when you're not the one doing it. .... Martha also said that prison
was the toughest, most humbling place she's ever been in. Ya know,
outside of a K-Mart. .... Microsoft chairman Bill Gates was given
an honorary knighthood by Queen Elizabeth today. I believe he's
now known as The Duke of Nerds. .... Rapper Nelly has been nominated
for two Country Music TV Awards. Nelly collaborated with Tim McGraw
on a song. That's an interesting combination, isn't it? Country
and rap? What would you call that? Crap, I guess. .... In an interview
on Japanese television President Clinton said that Hillary Clinton
would make a great president. Lousy intern, but a great president.
.... Eighty-seven-year-old West Virginia Senator Robert Byrd is
in trouble after he compared Senate Republicans to the Nazis. He
would have compared them to the Ku Klux Klan but he used to be a
member. .... CNN, God bless them, has become the first national
cable television news network to air commercials for hard liquor.
Did you see their new slogan? "CNN -- News with Booze." …. Here
in California, Governor Schwarzenegger has come out in support of
a plan to ban junk food in our schools. He wants to ban the vending
machines because our kids are too fat. In fact, it’s so bad, our
bullies can’t fit the fat nerds in the lockers anymore. …. Tomorrow
night is Dan Rather’s final night as the CBS anchorman. Seems like
just yesterday he was making up his first story, doesn’t it? ….It
was this week in 1836 that Texas declared its independence from
Mexico. Now I understand California is thinking about doing the
same thing. …. You know what’s fascinating – you know the first
person to call Martha when she was released from jail? Michael Jackson.
He said he wanted to know what it’s like for a white woman in prison.
David Letterman.... "Top Other Changes At CNN": Wolf Blitzer
changing name to Blitz Wolfer; When covering a hard story, reporters
ask, "What would Jack Daniels do?"; Every Sunday it's "WKRP in Cincinnati"
marathons; Reporters must make quotation marks with fingers when
calling Bush "President"; They're putting Lou Dobbs on steroids;
Every night, one lucky viewer receives an on-air physical from Dr.
Sanjay Gupta; Last 10 minutes of newscasts, anchors sing hits from
the 70s, 80s, 90s and today; Changing name to CNNN; Interactive
feature allows viewers to administer painful electric shock to Larry
King.
Roseanne Barr (on Leno): Defense lawyers say they might
have Michael Jackson testify. They don’t really want him to, but
doctors believe it’s the only way they can get his nose to grow
back. You know, I kid Michael, but it is really just great to tell
jokes about someone who’s had more plastic surgery than me.
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